The trip to Missouri was way fun. It was a great vacation. (In a "I slept most of the time" sort of way.) Back to Mothering duties today. I have a cold.
After changing a particularly nasty diaper, (most every diaper is particularly nasty nowadays) I realized that baby Garry was in terrible need of a bath. Being the economical person that I am, I ran to start the tub before I put on his new diaper. See, this was a particularly stupid move on my part, as the baby chased me. He always chases me. Why didn't I think he would chase me? I'm an idiot.
Anyways, I turn around from starting the water to see him standing in the bathroom doorway wizzing all over the floor. (There's something about seeing bath water that makes him wizz, I don't know why.) Knowing my own foolishness had gotten me into this predicament, I laughed. You know, in a "chuckle chuckle but I can handle a little bit of wizz" sort of way. The situation ceased to be amusing when he walked over and started dancing in his potty-puddle whilst wearing his socks. Yuck. Still, I'm a soldier, we soldiers can handle soaking potty-socks.
Bath time proceeded uneventfully, ending with mommy committing the unforgivable sin of washing the baby's hair. (It's okay, I'm used to being the bath-time-bad-guy.)
I dried him off and went to get a diaper. Then the raisin happened. I've discovered that most of the world's unfortunate occurrances begin with raisins. Whose idea were raisins anyway? Seriously. So he found a raisin on the floor in the bedroom. I arrived just in time to see my little butt-naked baby squatting down to retrieve the delicious raisin (He'd spilled a whole box of them this morning.) Time moved in slow motion, I see a stream of wizz wetting the carpet in front of said raisin. Then, he stands. And, in abject horror, I see something I had hoped never to see in my life. My son had left me a couple of choice presents while he was retrieving his raisin. It was disgusting. Nasty. Awful. At this point I threw in the towel and phoned daddy to request his immediate return from work. Soldier that I am, I retrieved his little gifts all by myself, and disposed of them properly. But seriously, what was that boy THINKING?! Sheesh. You think you know a person....